American television used to be well…Amurican. Ripped men and women with perfectly coiffed hair held in place by dangerous amounts of hair spray would enter the American Gladiators arena to dominate each other with brute force. Rules were applied but rarely followed, and the gladiators often lashed out at their opponents during fits of roid rage. Young boys and old men would watch in disbelief as their favorite gladiator—Malibu, Gemini, Kyler Storm—would throw punches, shoot Nerf balls at 110 mph or hang from iron rings while leg wrestling. Let us not forget the ladies; with names like Dallas, Diamond, Elektra, Blaze and Flame, they inspired women everywhere with their toned abs and fierce demeanor. These girls didn’t take shit from anyone and put the men in their place.
That’s what TV used to be: an arena for warriors and badasses, but now it’s full of wannabe idols, high school musicals and clips of the Biebs naked with hookers. Never forget the days when American Gladiators were the true stars!
1. Kyler Storm’s Amazing Football Move.
2. Ginger vs. Gemini
3. Fire Meets Ice
4. Like A Freight Train
5. Malibu takes the most excellent hit of his life.
Hands down the most epic moment of the AG run. Rumor has it that Malibu has not aged and now prefers wine over beer.